Don’t Buy Now

Although this spring/summer have brought us some of my favorite trends in a while (color blocking, summer neutrals, tribal), I’ve seen a few trends that I actually despise, and I know will be the ones we look back at in 5 years and say, “What was I thinking?”

The latest trend in footwear reminds me of cement blocks and Shape Ups. To me, shoes are supposed to be sexy. Height is sexy, having long legs is sexy, and wearing high heels makes your legs look long, therefore, making you feel and look sexy, right? Flatforms do the exact opposite. Yes, they add height, but your legs don’t look sexy! You just look like you’re wearing a comfortable, strappy block on your foot! Do you not remember when Steve Madden was producing platform flip flops in the 90s? The Spice Girls wore this style, and we all know that they were not exactly the most well dressed gals. Flatforms are totally unsexy, totally non-versatile and totally… weird. I don’t care if they’re comfortable! Say no to the flatform!

Um, what? Who decided that an accessory for a geek/nerd Halloween costume was acceptable to wear on a regular basis? Plus, you’re totally ripping off every cheesy Disney star (do you really want to look like Justin Bieber?) and wannabe emo. One of my friends loves dressing up as a nerd (and will take any excuse to do so), and she always wears this type of glasses when doing so. If it was acceptable to wear them all the time, she probably would. BUT IT’S NOT! If you’re going to wear fake glasses, wear ones that make you look sexy and sophisticated (see: frameless, rectangular), not ones you picked up at Party City next to suspenders and high socks.

I’m totally into the cut-out trend. I love having a little skin peeking out in unexpected places, such as on my back, my sides, etc. However, what I don’t like is to look like this (yes, that’s the image triggered by the bathing suit above). It’s like your belly-button is artwork and your bathing suit is the frame! Cut-outs should be sexy and mysterious (like giving you a taste of skin without looking trampy), but this is anything but sexy to me. It’s just… weird. Let’s limit cut-outs to anywhere but our stomachs.

Let me start by saying that I’m not totally opposed to this trend. When a printed pant is done right (say, on a great romper that fits you perfectly, or a structured pair of pants paired with heels), they can look totally killer, kind of like you shopped in your grandma’s closet, but look ten times better than she does in them. But, this trend can go terribly awry. It starts with the material: you buy printed pants in some silky, loose material. This makes them the most comfortable thing you’ve ever bought… almost like pajamas. However, this makes them look like pajamas as well. Then, you make an even bigger mistake and pair them with flats. Flats that look like slippers. You see where I’m going with this? I even saw someone wearing this exact mistake with a semi-loose shirt! Let’s keep the graphic pants structured and high-waisted and pair them only with plain, tight tops. Capeesh?

Well, those are the trends I’m dying to light on fire.

What are the trends you’re not digging right now? What are the past trends? Let me know in a comment.

One thought on “Don’t Buy Now

  1. Pingback: Forever Addicted |

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